We know that, in today's society, it's important to appear empathetic to others even if you don't actually care about them or what they're saying.
That's why we've put together this handy guide to help you navigate those awkward social situations where you're expected to show concern for others.
Do you feel me?
Do you get where I'm coming from?
Are you with me?
Step 1: Be Vague & Ambiguous
The first step to increasing empathy is to be vague and ambiguous. Make sure to use words that have multiple meanings or are open to interpretation.
Use simplified language, being mindful to avoid words with a singular meaning.
For example, instead of saying "I'm having a bad day," say "I'm having a day."
Instead of saying "I'm sad," say "I'm feeling a certain way"
No opinion when asked for one?
"That could be interesting."
When you use vague and ambiguous language, you are forcing the listener to fill in the blanks. This process of filling in the blanks is what helps us to empathize with others, because we are forcing the listener to put themselves in our shoes and see the world from our perspective.
So, if you want to increase empathy, don't be afraid to use vague and ambiguous language. It is a powerful tool that can help you to connect with others on a deeper level.
Step 2: Be Noncommittal
The second step to increasing your conversational empathy is to be noncommittal. This makes it difficult for people to hold you accountable, and who wants to actually pay enough attention for that sort of thing anyway?
Some helpful phrases include:
"You don't say!"
"How about that?"
"Isn't that something?"
"Well I'll be!"
and just imagine how many more noncommittal statements you might be able to use!
Step 3: Be Confusing
The third step to increasing empathy is to be confusing. Try to use words that are difficult to understand or that are contradictory.
If pressed, ask what the other person thinks, and agree that whatever is being questioned seems to be “in the realm/nature/spirit/vicinity” of what they’re already thinking.
Or just inform them that they already know what you think. Obviously. It’s not like you’re some kind of weirdo. lol
Also, use emotional language. Using emotional language will help the listener to feel as though they are relating to you in an empathetic way even if they don't actually understand what you're saying.
For example, instead of saying "I'm excited", say "I'm feeling tingly about it".
Step 4: Be Incoherent
The fourth step to increasing empathy is to be incoherent. This means using words that don't make sense or that are unrelated to each other.
For example, instead of saying: "I'm going to the store", say: "I'm going to the store to buy some milk, but I'm not sure if I'm going to buy milk, but I'm going to the store."
Sometimes, when we’re too deep into our feelings, there simply aren’t any right words that can make sense of things to say them to other people who can either feel them, or not feel them. And everyone can empathize with that.
Step 5: Be Unintelligible
The fifth and final step to increasing empathy is to be unintelligible. This means using words that are so difficult to understand that they are essentially gibberish.
For example, instead of saying "I'm hungry," you could say "blargblargblarg."
Because oldthinkers unbellyfeel ingsoc.
Think in newspeak.
If you have a problem consult 10th newspeak dictionary.
In conclusion, by following these steps, you will greatly increase perceived empathy in your everyday interpersonal communications!
So go forth and spread empathy far and wide, one confusing and incoherent statement at a time!
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*** This author generates media with contributions from (and/or in collaboration with) various A.I., which is then reviewed, edited, and revised to the liking of the author, who takes ultimate responsibility for all publications.***
Particularly good inhnk or bad . How do you feel about it. Ahh right totaly agree it very kinda glorky